Sunday, 15 June 2008


I have a sore throat and I've lost my voice. As a fan of professional wrestling, that can only mean one thing - I went to see a wrestling show last night.

As I'm sure you're aware, TNA are in the UK for the first time in the company's history. There weren't too many huge names but the fact that TNA was in town was enough to draw a near enough sell out audience of around 2,000 people to Coventry's Skydome.

My friend Rossa and I got there early in the day for the Fanzone event. A great opportunity to meet the very wrestlers we'd see in action later that night.

Petey Williams seemed very miserable and as if he didn't want to be there at all. He must have been extremely tired from the day's workout. Because there's no way you look like him without working out loads.

Sonjay Dutt seemed just as miserable. Though it was probably because the queue for evil Earl Hebner was longer than his. I'm not sure why though. He came across as a weird, creepy uncle. In fact, it looks as if I'm sat on his knee in the picture I had taken of me with him.

Our seats from the fifth row were superb. The only downside was that I was squashed over onto Rossa's lap by the fat, Canadian mark sat next to me.

The atmosphere last night was incredible. I'm used to crowds being up for it who usually go nuts at the sound of the bell, calm down a bit, then pop for spots. But last night, there was noise from start to finish. It was absolutely electric. Because I'd gone with three other stand-up comedians, it was only natural that the highlights of the evening would be us dicking around.

Some mark sat near me started his own "You screwed Bret" chant at Earl Hebner when he came out. If he was older than 4 or 5 when the Screwjob happened, then whatever, he's just holding a grudge. But this kid was mark to the max. When he relented at chanting "You screwed Bret!" all on his own, I turned to the people I was with and very loudly began my own onanistic chanting.


I'm so funny it's untrue sometimes.

The best bit may have been during a match between LAX and Petey Williams and Sonjay Dutt. Somebody sitting directly behind me yelled "MIDGET STEINER!".

I don't know who it was, but I'm ever so thankful. They gave me the ball, and I ran with it. "MIDGET STEINER! CLAP CLAP CLAP-CLAP CLAP..." I'm sure half the arena was chanting it at one point. Hernandez was laughing it up and even Sonjay was finding it hard not to laugh at his own tag partner.

For posterity's sake, I'll mention that Kurt Angle didn't wrestle. This isn't at all surprising considering how painfully he hobbled by at the Fanzone event earlier in the day. He came out to cut a promo and introduced Jeff Jarrett to the fans. A nice little surprise considering he's not even been on TV for about a year.

The main event happened shortly after Jeremy "Hollywood" Borash (the guy's a dick, seriously) announced that TNA would be back in the UK in January. HOORAY. The main event was essentially Samoa Joe beating the crap out of Booker T to the delight of the fans. Not a classic, but a definite crowd-pleaser.

If I remember correctly, the faces went over cleanly in almost every match. Exactly what you want if you want to please the fans as much as possible. All in all, TNA definitely have their spot in the UK market and, with the best promotion, could take on WWE here.

UPDATE: In fact, it looks as though TNA are taking on WWE here. The venues for their return tour in January are huge.

Full listings here.

You'll also notice on the latest edition of TNA Today that you can hear Rossa, Brooker, Jim and myself clearly and loudly chanting "WE SOLD OUT!". Click here to watch.

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